'touch the panda' ... i haven't heard that one before, but i like it.

a chinese man was bitten by a panda -- and then bit the panda back.

"He felt a sudden urge to touch the panda with his hand," and jumped into the enclosure, the newspaper said.

maybe we can turn "touch the panda" into another masturbation euphamism.

yeah, i was up late last night and decided to touch the panda before i went to bed.
don't you know that if you touch the panda, you'll go blind?

and the whole thing reminds me of a joke from "the simpsons" ... from "yah-hoo!," the "hee-haw" knockoff show where lurleen sang.

redneck 1: i caught my wife sleepin' with another man.
redneck 2: bitter?
redneck 1: yeah ... i bit him too.