avocado salad

I've lost my cooking mojo recently. The past two "complicated" meals I've tried to make have both turned out to be disasters. Last night, I attempted to sear scallops, to go with a garlic-olive oil sauce with linguini and grape tomatoes ... and that part turned out just fine, though the garlic did come a bit too close to being burned in the skillet.

See, I let the tomatoes, oil and garlic kind of marinate over extremely low heat for about 15 minutes. I tend to use the Emeril-esque "let the flavors mingle" theory, and it normally works out, but sometimes the garlic gets a bit too warm for its own good. Amina commented a few weeks ago that it smelled like burning rubber in the kitchen -- that definitely was a garlic emergency.

The real problem: the bay scallops. I normally go to Whole Foods to get my scallops (both sea and bay) and this time there were none to be had. Not to worry, I thought; I can get them frozen at another grocery store -- which I did, and I thought my problems were solved.

Turns out that even after careful thawing and drying, there was a ton of water in the bay scallops. My carefully created butter and olive oil mixture in the pan turned to a thin, white soup once the bay scallops hit the pan. Thus everything had to cook a lot longer to get the sear I wanted, which meant gummy scallops ... which are definitely not Good Eats.

(Couldn't resist.)

A few weeks ago, I roasted a chicken, following Anthony Bourdain's directions. I lovingly chose a chicken from my local butcher's. I dutifully mixed my herb butter. I treated the inside of the chicken's cavity. I did everything right -- being careful not to tear the skin as I patted the butter under it ...

I followed the directions. The chicken skin was golden brown, the veggies fragrant with the sweetness of the white wine. I pulled the bird out and let it sit while I made the sauce ... which turned out quite well, let me say, though not at all what I was expecting.

I assembled all the parts and started to carve the bird. Hmmm, I thought. There isn't much meat on the breasts. In fact, I couldn't even find the breasts. I called Amina over for advice. She also had trouble. I was amazed -- a plump, juicy bird was really lacking for meat.

Then it hit me.

I prepared and roasted the damn thing upside down. What I thought was the breastbone was actually closer to the business end of the chicken. The chicken roasted upside down. The part that was supposed to be the crowning glory was just an afterthought.

But my, what a tasty chicken ass dinner we had that nght.